Don’t Let the Light Go Out

As I began to write this, it was the last day of Chanukah. It was January 2nd, 2025, or on the Jewish Calendar, the 2nd of Tevet, 5785. As we lit the candles on Wednesday night, our Chanukiah shone bright with its nine candles. I stayed back after others walked away and stared at the candles, as they began to melt.

There was something warm and wonderful in the light of the candles, and as they melted, and finally fizzled out, their light quickly turned to darkness. The light of the nine bright candles on the Chanukiah, followed by the dark when they were gone, felt like a metaphor of our world right now.

Are we living in a Dark time right now? Will history remember the early part of the 21st century as a harsh time in history? I feel like one person after the next, when I ask them about their feelings, or hopes for 2025, give me the same answer: “Well, I hope it’s better than 2024.” Or, “The world has to gone to hell, it just has to get better than this.”

Whether it is a personal pain, challenges in a community or an existential threat of a nation or a group, it’s hard to find to many areas of light in the last five years for so many people.

It’s like the light is going out in the world. I recently wrote about that wonderful feeling at the start of a new day, and how it brings possibility. I felt the same this past week as we lit the Chanukiah each night. On the first night, there was just a bit of light, with two candles (the “shamash” or helper candle, and the first candle). Each night we added a candle, and with that, more light. It was small, but I felt a greater sense of optimism and hope each night, as our candelabra grew brighter.

The bright candles made me think about how I, or any individual, can help make sure we don’t let the light go out. While the candles melted and fizzled out each night, each additional candle gave more light, and together the candles gave off a beautiful glow.

But, no matter how hard I tried to think about the light, the darkness was there too. I didn’t have to look too far to see the darkness working hard to overtake the light, to suppress it and make it fizzle, like the candles.

The problem is, darkness is easier than light. It’s so much simpler to break something than fix it. Try to stop. No problem. But to start again – much harder.

It takes a lot of work to make light, not just for a candle or a lamp. For many people, it takes a lot of work to be happy and find joy. A fight may happen quickly, but it can time, work, and a lot of patience, to come to a compromise or make up.

Is that why it seems so dark in the world right now? Are we letting ourselves fall into anger and fighting, and we won’t let the light in, to bring calm and joy? How is there so much hate? Does every generation say this, or is the darkness particularly bad right now, and getting worse?

I keep thinking back to how I felt, when the room was bathed in light a couple days ago, by the nine candles of the Chnaukiah. It’s a similar feeling to seeing the colourful bulbs of a Christmas tree or the diyas (small oil lamps) that may line a walkway on Diwali. They all bring light to the darkness.

The light brings people together, and I really believe it has the potential to make good things happen. Think of the Olympic flame, which shines bright over the iconic games. Thousands of athletes, from diverse cultures and races, for the most part, put controversies or disagreements aside to share in the joy of sport. And overtop, especially at night, is that beautiful flame, reminding everyone that with light comes optimism and joy. It pushes us to do good things.

So, we can’t light Chanukah candles every night (though my kids would love that, as that means a gift every night of the year!). But, metaphorically, we also can’t let the light go out. We need to imprint that light in our heads, remember that wonderful feeling of the warmth of the glow around us, when the candles are burning bright.

We need to wrap our arms around the light, and together, we need to make it easier to live in a world with light than darkness. I want 2025 to be better than 2024. Let’s release some of that anger and hate. Let’s try to bring a bit of peace to the world. Let’s give people a chance to succeed and thrive.

We can do it. Just don’t let the light go out.

Let’s Talk about Blue Monday

blue monday

I joined a few work colleagues for lunch yesterday and, among a number of conversations, we discussed the weather. It’s been really cold in Toronto, with a lot of grey skies and falling snow. I told them I’m excited that the forecast for Friday is a temperature above freezing and sunshine. We all agreed that we can handle the frigid weather, but the lack of sunshine has been hard.  It’s January, deep into the Canadian winter, which makes me think about the concept of Blue Monday.

Is it real or is this simply a phenomenon created by our capitalist society to get us to spend big money on sun vacations in the winter? As I read yesterday, the concept of Blue Monday was actually created back in 2005 in the United Kingdom to do just that – sell travel vacations. Many corporations have since latched on to the term purely for promotional purposes.

But society as a whole, or least societies that experience a harsh winter, have embraced this too. From what I have read, the third Monday in January is the day every year that it all comes together – the misery of cold and dark, post-holiday bills to pay and for some, a reminder of New Year’s resolutions.

There is no clear evidence backing up Blue Monday, in particular one day of the year that makes us all feel just blah all day. But I believe that January, in particular mid to late January, can be a challenge emotionally for many of us.

While I am not affected by big spending in December as I don’t celebrate Christmas, and I am definitely not one for New Year’s resolutions, I am affected by dreary dark and cold weather. And as I think about it, while I don’t make resolutions at the beginning of the year, my behaviour and actions are definitely influenced by the start of a new year.

By mid to late January, if things are not going my way, and if every day I wake up in darkness and trudge outside in my heavy coat and clunky boots, no doubt I am affected and feel blue. Lately my anger can be ignited more easily and I am definitely not handling stressful situations as well as I may in July.

I will admit that not all of this can be blamed on Blue Monday, as life has thrown me a few curveballs recently. But I am sure the time of year plays a role. I want to put aside the promotional aspect of Blue Monday and encourage everyone to talk about any funk you may be in. Mental health should no longer be something we sweep under the rug and ignore. It’s real, and I think many Canadians, deep in the winter, as we spend more time inside, behind closed doors, have a hard time coping.

We may not be able to do away with Blue Monday, but I think we can all find some coping mechanisms. For me, I try to relax and find a few moments every day that are just for me. I am not good at that. It can be a 30-minute TV show, a few pages of my book, a few seconds of utter silence, or on the weekend, a day at the ski hill.

And we can talk and write about Blue Monday and accept that many of our friends and family may be suffering from the blues or blahs right now. We can be there for each other and find ways to enjoy the dark and cold days of winter. Before you know it, spring will be here, with longer days, warm sunshine and budding trees.

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