Musings – Page 17 – KINETIC MOTIONS

August 3, 2017August 4, 2017

Where Did the Evening Go?

Have you ever asked yourself that question? You start the day fresh, with so many ideas and plans of what you will accomplish at work and at home. That brief will be completed and handed in to the boss, dinner will be cooked and on the table at 6:30 pm and all the laundry will be washed and folded. Oh, and you will go through that growing stack of paper on the table in the hall. At the office, you put out fires all day and the brief is left half-written. You pick up dinner on your way home and throw it on the table at 7:00. One load of laundry is left in the washer and the stack of paper has grown again. It’s 11:00 pm, you are exhausted and ask yourself, where did the evening go?

Are the days getting shorter or is my life just getting busier? With three young children and a new career and professional life developing I know I have big dreams. I know I can’t have it all, but at least I can try to accomplish many of the tasks on my list. It seems so easy every morning when I have energy and a cup of coffee in me to dream about everything I want to get done that day, that week and that month. By the end of the day, most days, I ask myself, where did the evening go?

Children really have a great talent of destroying an evening. That’s right I said it. My children are the loves of my life, but wow, I can’t get anything done when they are around. The baby, as cute as she is, monopolizes me and my time when I am home with her. By 5:00 pm, like a typical 14-month-old, Nessa is whiny and crabby and claws at my ankles like a pesky dog. Her seven-year-old sister, Julia, refuses to go to bed lately, claiming there is no bedtime during summer vacation. My husband has been getting home from work late often, so dinner is only cleaned up after 8:00 pm.

By 9:00 pm dinner is usually cleaned up, the baby is usually asleep in her crib and there are only a few toys left on the family room floor. Julia is still running around the house screaming she is not tired and I may have remembered to put a load in the laundry.

When we hit 10:00 pm sometimes Julia has fallen over unconscious on a chair or the couch and I tidy up around her. Now it’s time to get lunches ready for the next day, send the daily email or letter to camp so that Matthew doesn’t think I don’t love him and switch over the laundry (if I remember that I put a load in in the first place).

At 11:00 pm my brain has fallen asleep but I think my body is still in motion. Maybe I will have a snack or take a shower. Maybe I will tidy Julia’s supremely messy room as she is still asleep on the living room chair. Then the baby wakes up and she is screaming and telling me I am a terrible mother for leaving her in her crib in that dark horrible room.

Where did the evening go? That’s where my evening went. Forget preparing for the next day’s blog post or going through that large stack of paper on the table, reading the next chapter of my book, catching up on old episodes of House Hunters on HGTV or cleaning the fridge.

And the next morning, as I wake up fresh and ready for the day I ask myself as I think about the day before, where did the evening go? And I tell myself that that won’t happen today because today is a new day and I will accomplish everything I set out to do. I will keep thinking that way because one day I will come through on my promise and one evening I will prepare the next day’s blog post, go through that large stack of paper on the table, read the next chapter of my book, catch up on old episodes of House Hunters and clean the fridge. When will that day happen?

August 1, 2017

The Secrets of the Coffee Boutique

Ordering, brewing and drinking coffee has become an art form. For years, I was not interested at all in the beverage and preferred to consume only water and once in a while a cup of tea. When I was pregnant with my second child I became hooked on the taste of coffee and drank the odd decaffeinated drink. When I was pregnant with my third child I craved coffee and over the last year it has become a staple in my diet.

I don’t think I am unique in my change from scorning coffee to falling in love with it. It’s hard to walk more than a few steps in a big city without passing a large franchise like Starbucks, Second Cup or even Tim Hortons or a small boutique that offers its own exclusive roasted beans. Coffee is everywhere, and in a society that is always on the go, when we all feel there are not enough hours in the day, coffee has become our fuel.

I was at a party a couple of nights ago and this topic came up in the conversation. We were a lively group, enjoying a beautiful summer evening outdoors, so when one person pulled out his smartphone to share some Starbucks secrets with us we were game to hear.

Have you ever looked at the colour of your Starbucks barista’s apron? By the way, until a few years ago, had any of us ever heard the word “barista?” Starbucks recently revealed the meaning behind some special edition aprons. Most of us associate Starbucks with their signature green apron, but oh, there are other colours too!

If you see a rare purple apron, for example, you must be at a Starbucks in Europe, and it means your barista is a winner of the Europe, Middle East and Africa Barista Championship. In the United States, there is a Starbucks College Achievement Plan, and those graduates get a mortarboard embroidered on their green aprons. Then there’s the black apron, which is more common than the coveted purple in Europe, and it is given to baristas who are Coffee Masters.

So, I learned a Starbucks secret. Then I wondered, are there other coffee secrets? Are there secret menu items at my local coffee establishment to which I was not privy? A quick search on Google and I learned a few things.

I found an article from a few years ago from Yahoo that gave me some ideas of secret menu items that I will have to try. I like the “Red Eye” at Second Cup, which is their brewed coffee with a shot of espresso. Regulars at Starbucks sometimes order the “Marble Mocha Macchiato,” which is “white mocha on the bottom with no whip, shot on the top and mocha drizzle.” It is popular at Tim Hortons to order half-half drinks, such as a drink that is a half-brewed coffee and the other half cappuccino. The Yahoo article also mentions that officially, a “Double-Double” is not on the menu!

What are some other coffee secrets? Are there classified menu items that I should whisper to my barista the next time I visit my local café? I really would love to know. Post a comment here or on Facebook or tweet me @AliciaRichler.

July 31, 2017

Filling the House with Family

How many members of your family – or your spouse’s family – have you crammed into your home in one day, one evening or one weekend? The most relatives I have ever hosted for dinner was 32, and Holiday meals at my house average 25 people. I have hosted parties for family or friends with dozens of people too. But how many of these relatives have stayed at your house overnight?

Each year, throughout the summer, my husband, David, and I host a ton of close family who are visiting from overseas. So, when I say we “host” I mean we cram in various family members for days at a time into our house. David’s family lives all over the world, from faraway places like Israel and New Zealand to various towns in Ontario like Peterborough and London. Their main destination is the family’s beloved country home in Saint-Donat, Quebec (details on that house coming in a future post). But they also enjoy some big-city fun, BBQ steak and a visit to our home while they are in Canada.

Once in a while we will host a few relatives, but usually when one plans a visit they line up behind him or her and come along too. In the summer of 2014, just after we moved into our current home, I believe we crammed 12 or 13 people into the house for four days. I had people sleeping on couches, a futon, a couple of beds and even the floor. There were toys, clothes and scraps of food everywhere. My fridge overflowed with food and emptied every few hours, and we gave our stove and oven a good workout. There was screaming and whispering and tears and laughter.

This week was the start of our annual summer hosting of David’s family, and this weekend we were a rowdy group of 8 people in the house. We made full use of our spacious home, with people sleeping on the futon, a couch, beds and even the floor. I cooked from all the food groups, starting with a huge steak and chicken BBQ dinner on Friday night, and the festivities came to a crescendo Sunday night with my first-ever attempt at fish and chips.

Family will continue to arrive and depart Canada in the coming weeks, and most of them will make a stop at our house. Next weekend David’s sisters are joining us, then a few days later his brother arrives. Each guest is different, and as is the case with all of us (including me, David and our children!), everyone has their quirks. Some are cleaner and tidier than others, some are loud while others are quiet, but one thing is clear – they all like to eat!

Now don’t get me wrong – I enjoy hosting family, and I love to cook for a crowd. In particular, I like to cook for a crowd who appreciates food and like to eat. David and I look forward to the summer visits from various relatives, and we carefully plan our menus, sleeping arrangements and activities. But of course, it’s a lot of work, especially when our house is crammed with people for days.

This weekend’s relatives have moved on to other destinations and for a few days the house is quiet with only me, David and our girls at home. We will open our home again this coming weekend to family, find various places for them to sleep and fill the fridge with wondrous delights. Then we will come up for air, jump back in for another weekend, until it’s our turn to make our way to Saint-Donat and join the throngs of family along the shores of Lake Archembault.

July is almost over and as usual summer is flying by too fast. It’s nice to know that we can always count on visits from family to enrich the season. We feel blessed to have a large family who actually want to spend time together year after year, and we look forward to hosting them for years to come.

July 28, 2017

Will Canada Ever have a Real Child Care Program?

“Canada succeeds when women and girls are given opportunities to succeed.” This was part of a statement I read by a spokesperson at the Canadian Department of Social Development. On its own I agree wholeheartedly with this statement, and I believe that the current Prime Minister of Canada, Justin Trudeau, is a strong advocate of advancing the role of women in our society. However, while women and girls have more opportunities than ever to be educated and follow the career path of their choice, when they become mothers they have few choices for child care.

Our government is not doing enough to support educated and ambitious women who want to continue to pursue their career goals once they become mothers. Limited funds have been allocated to help Canadian families pay for the exorbitant cost of child care.

This week the International Monetary Fund (IMF) announced that the Government of Canada could spend $8 billion annually to help families reduce the cost of child care. Not only that, according to the IMF, this program would pay for itself, with more women going back into the workforce, contributing to the economy and paying more income tax.

I’m not going to analyze and discuss all the pros and cons of this specific idea brought forward by the IMF. I’m not a finance expert and have not read the full report. But I’m glad the report re-energized the conversation about the very high cost of child care.

In this year’s budget the federal government announced a new child care benefit plan, with money paid directly to families. The amount a family received was based on their income from the previous year. With this new initiative, lower income families, logically, receive the greatest amount of money. It is explained well in a Toronto Star article published on July 26:

“The $23-billion-a-year benefit is worth up to $6,400 annually for a child under six, and up to $5,400 a year for children six to 17. The benefit is income tested, meaning that the less a family earns, the more it receives in benefits per child.

“The IMF says the benefit doesn’t provide incentives for parents to work or get job training.

“The effect on low-income families may be the largest, with the IMF team calculating that they would see their finances worsen if both parents work due as a result of a reduction in the child benefit, increases in taxes, and covering the high cost of child care. Middle and high-income families see their finances improve or not change at all if both parents work, the report says.”

I definitely agree that the high cost of child care is encouraging women in low income families to just stay home. They get little financial benefit from working, often long hours, and paying someone else to care for their children.

However, while the financial benefit is significant in middle to higher income families when both parents work, the high cost of child care does take a hit on the overall financial situation of the family.

Middle income families in Canada are often faced with big expenses, such as a mortgage, carrying costs to run a home and the general cost of raising children (other than child care). The two incomes are necessary to pay the bills, and the added, often large child care expense, takes its toll. For a family with two or sometimes three young children, the child care bill can easily balloon to well over $2,000 per month, which represents a significant percentage of any salary.

I was lucky to find good, safe child care programs for my first two children, who thrived in daycare and full-day preschool. They attended full-day programs from the age of 12 months so that I could continue to work and contribute to the finances of my family. But it was very expensive.

My life has changed since my third child was born, and I am no longer in a full-time job (something I have discussed quite openly in previous posts). I do not need a full-time daycare program right now and am blessed to have the most wonderful and loving child care support part-time in my home for the baby. Right now, as I find my way in my career, I continue to balance my desire to work and earn an income with the cost of paying someone to be with my children when I do work.

It is a challenge that thousands of Canadian women are facing, and unless our government steps up to support young families, it is a challenge we will face for years to come.

July 27, 2017July 27, 2017

Life can be Beautiful

It begins with Carole King sitting in front of a grand piano speaking to the audience. She tells us that life doesn’t always go the way we plan. It’s what we do with where life takes us that can make it so beautiful. Then she sings So far away.

Last night at the theatre I felt like Carole King, played so eloquently by Chilina Kennedy, was speaking directly to me. Besides the fact that this play, Beautiful, was one of the best I have seen in a long time, with great music and a strong story, it got me thinking about the path I have taken in my own life.

Young Carol Klein was a brilliant and talented young woman who convinced a record producer to buy her song, at age 16. She was on a career path to become a teacher but instead became a composer, a lyricist, a singer and ultimately one of the greatest female artists of the past 50 years.

While it was never my dream to join the music industry (I play piano, but not like Carole King!), Beautiful made me think about the dreams I didn’t pursue and the path I have taken in life. Have I followed my dreams, and even if I haven’t, am I happy with where I am and what I have accomplished?

As a teenager I attended a performing arts high school for one year, with a major in dance and a minor in drama. I loved theatre and acting and at the tender age of 14 had aspirations to follow that path. While I participated in dance and drama classes and directed camp and school plays I kept this dream to myself and never pursued this path.

At age 16, the same age that Carole King wrote It Might as Well Rain Until September, I experienced that moment in chemistry class, soon after I created Kinetic Man, which made me want to drop science and become a journalist. I loved to write, but again, I pushed the idea aside.

I guess you could say I considered myself to be a sensible person. Instead of following my instincts to be a member of the arts or media communities, as an actor, a writer, or a journalist, I went to university, on a path to be a doctor. I soon realized that being sensible wasn’t going to work for me, and I am happy I followed my dream to become a journalist.

I will admit that over the past 15 years my career and life path have traveled in various directions and gone off on sometimes unplanned tangents. If I look back at my 14 or 16-year-old self, would I be happy with where I am now?

I’m definitely writing, and this blog is fulfilling a dream I have had for over 10 years. It has taken me years and many jobs to figure out that my true path is writing. Will I write a book, contribute to a publication or see where this blog takes me? Right now, I don’t know. But I do know that no matter what path I follow I will make it beautiful.

July 21, 2017

Doo Yoo No How too Spell Corectly?

My apologies for the multiple spelling errors in the title of this post. Can you read what I wrote? What I asked was, do you know how to spell correctly? The inability to spell has become an epidemic in our society. I don’t believe this is a situation that only exists within the younger generation. People of all ages simply cannot spell, and it drives me crazy.

I won’t even touch the topic of grammar etiquette as that is a whole other can of worms. For now, I will look at spelling.

We all learned to spell back in elementary school. I had regular spelling tests all the way through high school. First, I learned the simple words like “it,” “and,” or “cat,” then moved up to the four or five-letter words like “your,” “what,” or “table.” It became more complicated as I grew older, as I learned exceptions and longer words. English is a hard language, and it can be complicated to learn its nuances. However, everyone is capable of learning how to spell correctly.

Spelling errors are commonplace in elementary school, as a child learns how to read and write and sound out words. I would even allow for mistakes in high school as a teenager learns some of the harder words like “chrysanthemum” or “accommodate.” But, every high school graduate should understand the difference between “there” and “their” or “your” and “you’re.”

Technology has pushed its way into our daily lives. The art of letter writing seems to have disappeared, and we communicate by text and email. In some ways, we are writing more than ever. It’s easier to send your friend a text than walk across the room to ask a question. Employees prefer to email their colleagues instead of picking up the phone.

So, if we are talking less and writing more, shouldn’t we spell better? Text and email are so informal that people often don’t check what they wrote before sending, and the messages are sometimes unreadable. A person who cannot spell is as bad as someone who knows how but is too lazy to check if they spelled the words correctly.

Many would say that newspapers are a dying industry, as people receive their news in new and innovative ways each day. Copy editors lost their jobs years ago, and it shows. It is rare to read an article in even a respected publication anymore that does not have spelling errors. Someone had to edit it – the writer or some editor, I would think. I encourage them to please take the time to read through their articles and correct their spelling errors before pressing “publish.”

I could go on and on about my distress over the lack of good spelling in our society. Emails, texts, news articles, press releases, even road signs and books. Please, everyone, learn to spell, or at least use spell check. Take your time before you press “send” and make sure you spelled the words correctly. It will make me happy.

*Thanks to my friend Dara for seeing this Toronto Transit Commission (TTC) sign, snapping a photo and posting. It’s priceless.

July 20, 2017

My Husband David Usually Cooks and Bakes Great Food But….

My husband, David, loves to cook and bake. He does not cook and bake often, but when he does the food usually tastes really good. He always comes up with interesting and adventurous ideas for meals, and usually the result is delicious. I commend David for being enthusiastic about cooking and baking and helping out in the kitchen. I encourage him to keep experimenting with recipes. But… sometimes the food tastes a bit funky, or it looks strange or it takes David so long to make the food that I quietly grab a snack or two while he cooks and I don’t have the opportunity to eat his food.

David makes the BEST pie I have ever tasted. His two specialties are sour cherry and blueberry. I don’t know how to make pie so I have no idea what he does to make the crust perfectly flakey and the filling a perfect balance of sweet and tart. I have learned to never actually watch him prepare his pies as he manages to turn the kitchen into a space that looks like a hurricane blew through. Flour covers all surfaces; the floor is sticky and every bowl and utensil in the kitchen is utilized. He cleans up after the baking is complete, but the process is painful to watch.

Some of David’s baking experiments have not gone as well. The one I remember best was his version of Black Forest Chocolate Cake. My poor sister joined us when David presented this abomination, which definitely did not look or taste like a cake at all. Kudos to him for trying.

Barbecuing is not his forte either, as the food often comes off the grill either burnt or dry. Most men, in their macho way, see themselves as King of the Grill, but from my experience women are much better at grilling up perfect cuts of meat than men. Yes, I do the barbecuing in our house!

I don’t know what it is about males and eggs, but I have met many a Dad who can’t cook much but can make great eggs. Scrambled, sunny-side up or over-easy, David makes great eggs. He usually makes use of every fry pan and pot in the house when he cooks those eggs, but they taste great. It took him a while to figure out how to make pancakes, and his first try was rather unsuccessful. He has learned from his errors, and I know our children love his pancakes.

Speaking of eggs, David’s best dish is an egg-based middle eastern delicacy called Shakshuka. Simply put, it consists of eggs poached in a sauce comprised of tomatoes, chili peppers and onions, and it is spiced with cumin and black pepper. David cooked this dish for dinner last night, and it was the inspiration for today’s post.

David offered to cook this dish for dinner last night, even though he only started the prep well after 7:00 pm. He was slow moving and messy as usual, but wow, it was delicious! I cleaned my plate and even our seven-year-old polished off her portion.

So indeed, my husband David usually cooks and bakes great food. He is slow and messy and sometimes does not quite read the recipe correctly. But… I love that he cooks and I hope he keeps rolling out great food.

July 18, 2017

Two Months for this Blog and What have I Learned so far?

Time has a habit of happening very quickly. As I wrote in my first post on May 17, I always wanted to write, but it took me many years to compose my thoughts and create an online space where I could voice how I felt about many topics. I registered Kinetic Motions back in February of this year and knowing just a little about WordPress I launched this blog a few months later.

One thing I quickly figured out is that I am not an expert at this! Many people have guided me and shown me some tricks (thanks in particular to my brother Neil Richler!), and I have played around and experimented over the last five months to get this blog to where it is. I will admit that what you see is still very amateur, and I know that these pages will continue to evolve.

I would consider myself both a journalist and a strategic communications expert (yes one can be both). I have always been confident in my skills associated with these professions, in particular my writing and editing skills. I always worked closely with many online journalists and bloggers and social media experts. But, until recently my knowledge and deep understanding of how the blogosphere and social media space really worked and moulded our society was limited. Every day over the last two months, as I write and publish my work for all of you to read I am in awe of the world’s online space. I am excited to write each new post and share my thoughts with you.

But alas I do still have a lot to learn and hope to see my blog grow. What I have laid out is very basic and I am not sure how easy it is to navigate. I am starting to find my way through terms like SEO, Widgets, Plugins and a good Readability score. I feel good about the content – that it is interesting and appeals to a wide audience.

I am always happy to listen to advice and take some constructive criticism. It is how I will learn and grow as a writer and blogger. If you have suggestions on how to make this blog easier to navigate, how to improve its SEO or topics of interest to you that I should cover please do reach out to me. Send an email to kineticmotions17@gmail.com, leave a comment here, post to me on Facebook or Tweet me @AliciaRichler.

Thank you to everyone who follows and reads my blog. Your support is appreciated. Stay tuned for great things from Kinetic Motions!

July 17, 2017

Would you Accomplish More if you Worked Three Uninterrupted Hours a Day?

I just read an interesting historical fiction called New York, by Edward Rutherford. It follows the story of this great city from the 1600’s to the present day, interweaving real historical events with the lives of fictional characters. The book had many memorable moments, which I will not describe here, except for one in particular. It was less of a moment and more of a statement in a conversation at a dinner party near the end of the book. The characters were overworked and all spent hours each day at the office. One person brought forward the idea of uninterrupted work and getting more done in less time.

I will quote directly from the book as the author quite eloquently discussed the subject:

“’I was reading Virginia Woolf the other day, and she remarked that at one period in her life, she was able to get so much done because she had three uninterrupted hours to work in every day. And I thought, what on earth is she talking about? Only three hours a day? And then I looked around the office at all the people working their fourteen-hour days, and I thought, how many of you actually spend three hours in a real, creative, intellectual activity in a day? And I reckoned, probably not one.’ She smiled. ‘And there’s Virginia Woolf achieving more than they ever will in their lives, on three hours a day. It makes you think. They might do better if they worked less.’”

When I read this, it made me put the book down and think. For years I worked long days, spending hours at the office and often I continued my work at home late into the night. But how often did I have a true uninterrupted stretch to work each day? When I was at the office there were so many distractions around me. The office phone would ring, a colleague would stop by to ask a question or a group would congregate nearby and I would join the conversation. Add in the meetings and conference calls and I wonder now how I ever got anything done.

Once in a while, when I wanted to concentrate and really focus on my work, I left the office and worked instead at home. If the house was quiet and empty I could accomplish a whole day’s work in just a few hours. The distractions of the office weren’t there (yes, I know the house provides other distractions but I am able to usually avoid them!), and with few to no interruptions I used my time efficiently.

I believe I am not unique and that most of us would accomplish much more if we worked three uninterrupted hours each day. Now that I am a sole proprietor of a business and answer to myself each day I need a lot of self-discipline to get work done. I need to find time each day to focus my thoughts and energy and avoid distractions. When I do that I am always amazed how much I can accomplish.

I believe that it’s less about how many hours you work each day and more about how you use the hours you work. It is not about physically being at the office for 8, 10 or 12 hours in a given day but rather efficiently using those hours and completing your tasks. I think this is a philosophy that is slowly being embraced by many Canadian businesses and workplaces and something I strongly support and encourage. It is an approach I hope to follow as I go out on my own and work as independent professional. Just imagine how much I could accomplish every day if I gave myself three uninterrupted hours to work. My time is valuable and I hope to use it wisely.

July 14, 2017August 20, 2018

Everyone Should be Making Music Together

How many children’s songs do you know? Did you know that Twinkle Twinkle Little Star, Baa Baa Black Sheep and ABC are the same tune, written by Mozart? What songs do you remember from childhood? If you have children, do you sing to them or expose them to music?

Most adults can typically name only four or five children’s songs that they know well and admit that not only were they not exposed to music in childhood but that there is little of it in their home today. I believe that human beings are naturally musical but that musicality needs to be nurtured.

One of the simplest ways to cultivate the love of music in a child is to sing to them at home or play a tune when the child is an infant. Research has shown that even in utero a baby can hear and respond to music. A newborn baby, at least my newborn babies, sleep well with calming classical compositions in the background or the gentle voice of his or her mother, father or siblings.

After a short time, many babies graduate to music classes. Children’s music classes are popular throughout North America. It has actually become quite a business. I have been taking my kids to these classes for over ten years. Some are better than others and all are a great way to get a new mother out of the house and give her a great activity with her baby.

Whether the music class is a short session with a bunch of well-known children’s songs or a more in-depth course in music, singing and voice training, I feel everyone should try to expose their child to at least one session. The City of Toronto Public Library offers free (that’s right FREE) drop-in 30-minute “Move-and-Groove” classes for children aged 0-6. My one-year-old goes to that one all the time.

All three of my kids have benefitted most from a great program called “Making Music Together.” I won’t go into its history but you can read about it HERE. As the website states, the program is about “songs, chants, movement & instruments in a relaxed, fun, interactive environment.” Because of this program my children have all expressed their musicality in their own special way.

Walking into a Music Together class is quite an experience, though that may be the case for most baby and children’s music classes. The caregivers and children sit around in a circle and over a 45-minute period sing, dance and play instruments. Note that I say caregivers AND children. Each week, as I sit around this circle with my baby I chuckle to myself as I watch grown men and women, many with Masters degrees, MD’s or other professional designations, bark like dogs, tap little wooden sticks on their heads and skip around the room.

We spend years growing up, working hard to become mature adults, then at our children’s music class all pressures of adulthood are released. We can sing and dance and be free. It’s not just the children who benefit from music but the adults too. Lately I sing all day, all be it songs entitled Wiggle, See the Pony Galloping and Shake those ‘Simmons Down. Music energizes me and makes me feel good. I know it does the same for my children. Try singing one day, even to yourself. It’s worth it.